I'm tired -- I can't stop yawning, and my legs are achy, but in a good way. I had a most excellent weekend, and am now very sleepy, and sad that it's over.
The first perfect thing? The weather. It went from hot and sticky, nasty, humid, to cool, clear, and sunny between Friday night and Saturday morning. Yesterday, I ignored my internal clock and slept until I felt like getting up. I did a load of laundry, and happily hung it outside in the sun to dry, and cleaned all the floors, and then did some heavy-duty loafing for a couple of hours. That done, I wandered downtown to CVS (where a little boy made me laugh and laugh -- he was maybe three years old, and was marching around the store singing "I'm pregnant! I'm pregnant!" at the top of his lungs, while his red-faced father muttered "You are not! Only girls get pregnant! Stop saying that!" He caught my eye, he said "Honestly, I don't know where he learned that!" and I burst out laughing. Hee.) and then to the library and the grocery store. More loafing followed, until Jeff arrived at a little past 8 o'clock. He made yummy soft tacos for dinner, and then we took advantage of the lovely evening and went for a walk by the lake. We stood and looked at Mars for a while (after mistaking Venus for it, even though I knew it should have been brighter than that) and then, once the mosquitos found us, headed back to my place. We watched The Princess Bride, reciting most of it from memory, and then headed off to bed.
Today was even nicer, weather-wise -- cool to the point of being chilly this morning, then sunny and in the 70s. We got up relatively early, for us, and headed into Boston to explore the North End. I know, I know, I've lived here since 1992, and I'd never really been there. I am now madly in love, and want to live there. We wandered around until we found a restaurant that looked good (well, okay, one that looked good and inexpesive -- they all looked good, and there are a lot of them) and had lunch -- fried calimari for him, eggplant parmisiagna for me. We ate until we were stuffed, then staggered back out to explore -- we found the Paul Revere Park, and saw a random parade, and looked at the Old North Church, and found an old, old cemetery that was filled with big, glittering, green dragonflies, and then got cannolli and sat in the park to eat. After that, we wandered toward Faneuil Hall, where we browsed a toy store. Then we headed toward the waterfront, and spent some time lying on the grass in a pretty little park. I people-watched, though I really wanted a nap. Once we'd rested a bit, we went and sat by the water and talked, watching the planes take off over the water. After that, we went to Downtown Crossing, where I bought Lee's birthday presents (I suck. I thought today was her birthday. It was Thursday. Happy belated birthday, Lee! I'm sorry!) and then we headed back here, stopping along the way for dinner ingredients. We ate Gardenburgers and sweet corn, and watched Futurama (which, incidentally, is a bad show to try to make out to. It kept making me giggle.) and then I booted Jeff out so he could make the two-hour drive home and get some sleep. I miss him already, I love having him here.
Warning: sappiness may follow.
Saying "I've never felt this way before" is such a cliche, but you know, right now, it's true. I've never felt so comfortable around someone as I do with him. I've always felt a need to try to impress guys, to prove to them that I'm worth their time. I don't feel that need with him. I can be just me with him, and it's okay. It's better than okay. He makes me feel special, and smart, and beautiful, and I can honestly say I have never felt that way before, with any man. I didn't think it was possible to really feel that way. And then he came along, and I wasn't expecting it, and I resisted it for a long time, and held him at arm's length because I couldn't believe that someone so sweet, and so kind, and so good, would want to be with me. But he does, the poor boy, and I really couldn't be happier. Thus ends the sap. Hey, I had a good weekend.
You should know that I've just spend a full five minutes sitting in my chair and staring blankly out the window. My brain, it isn't working. That could be because of the Zoloft I'm on, or it could be the beer I had at dinner. Whatever it is, it's made me slightly goofy, and very stupid.
So, for your protection, a Friday Five:
1. When was the last time you laughed?
Earlier tonight, while on the phone with my mom, as I waited for my bus. Before that, I laughed a lot over beer and dinner with coworkers.
2. Who was the last person you had an argument with?
Hmm. Probably my brother. I don't have arguments very often, we do argue about politics fairly frequently.
3. Who was the last person you emailed?
Jeff, at work today.
4. When was the last time you bathed?
At about 6 o'clock this morning. I'd go take a shower, but it's all sticky and humid here. I hate taking a nice cool shower, then feeling sweaty and gross the instant I turn the water off.
5. What was the last thing you ate?
A veggie burger and fries. And beer! Tasty, tasty beer. I went out with coworkers to celebrate (and mourn) the departure of one of them -- she was our lovely part-time person, and worked evenings and weekends, keeping the place organized and babysitting my insane coworker. She's got a much better opportunity lined up, so we're glad for her, but sad for us. We'll never find anyone half so good for that job.
Wow, again with the staring into space. I'm really tired. The Zoloft makes me so sleepy I can barely drag my ass out of bed in the morning. The fact that I don't have to get up at all tomorrow if I don't want to makes me teary-eyed with joy. But, on the plus side, I'm not quite so much the jittering ball of anxiety that I was a few weeks ago. I am stressed at the moment, but it's manageable. Also, my back is feeling better. I can sit upright in a chair like a grownup now, instead of slouching and fidgeting to find a position that doesn't make me want to gnaw my own leg off. I have a physical therapy appointment Tuesday, and I have been stretching my back a lot (the cat helps my stepping on me, head-butting me, and sticking her butt in my face) and putting ice on it a lot, and it's improving, very slowly. The weather is supposed to be nice this weekend (no more heat and nasty humidity) and Jeff will be here. We are going to prowl around the North End and eat cannolli. Yum!
Yeah, yeah, I know. Lazy, bad journaller. So how've you been? You look great, did you cut your hair?
So. Here is a late Friday Five:
1. What time do you wake up on weekday mornings?
My alarm is set for 5:30, but I hit the snooze button until 6. It's brutal, I tell you.
2. Do you sleep in on the weekends? How late?
Ooooh, yes. If I don't have anything planned for early in the day, I sleep until I feel like getting up, which is usually sometime between 10:30 and noon. I am slothful on the weekends.
3. Aside from waking up, what is the first thing you do in the morning?
Take my current one billion different medications, then stagger downstairs for coffee and a glass of water.
4. How long does it take to get ready for your day?
During the week, it takes about 45 minutes or so, counting time to stare at the TV blankly while drinking coffee. On the weekends, it can take hours.
5. When possible, what is your favorite place to go for breakfast?
Hmm. I haven't been out for breakfast in ages. I guess I like greasy-spoon places, where I can get obscenely large omelettes and toast.
So, yeah, one billion different pills in the morning. My back still hurts (but it is a little bit better) and I finally did something I really should have done ages ago -- I saw someone about the incessant, and really very annoying, anxiety attacks. I just got tired of them, and finally figured out that I can't make them go away on my own, so I saw a very nice, soft-spoken shrink, who put me on Zoloft. I'm on too low a dose for it to be doing anything yet, but my brother has taken it, also for anxiety, and did really well. So here's hoping it works. And I'm going to need it because work is just going to suck for the week. My boss is away for a month, at least (and if you could spare some good thoughts, well-wishes, or prayers for this complete stranger to you, it'd be appreciated) and my one really good coworker is out of the country. My crazy coworker's mother died Thursday, so he's gone for at least a week. That leaves us really short-staffed, and me in charge. Oy.
But I did have a good weekend to relax and get prepared for it. Jeff was here this weekend: he arrived last night, cooked me falafel, and endured my weeping all over his shoulder while we watched To Kill a Mockingbird. (I love that movie.) Today, we headed into the hot sticky ball of humidity that is Boston to spend the day with Amelia (whose URL I do not have). We ate Thai food, shopped, dodged rain storms, and posed for photos in front of Condom World (the clerks would not allow photography in the store, so you don't get to see me playing with a whip and being horrified by the enormous dildos.) We wandered through the mall, and I got my watch battery replaced (at the second shop we tried -- at the first one, the clerk told me my battery was fine, even though the watch kept stopping and the battery was 3 years old. I suspect he thought I'd be dumb and just drop a bunch of money on a new watch, which I can't afford.) Amelia is a riot -- I had met her once, but hadn't gotten to talk to her much. I'm glad that was remedied, and I hope to be able to see her soon.
We parted ways with her at Haymarket, and went home to watch Futurama, and the bewildering yet funny Banzai, and then I booted Jeff out during the Simpsons. And now it is hot and sticky and I'm going to go to bed.