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April 23, 2001
Falling apart at the seams...
I spent the weekend recovering from the nasty, vile, evil cold, and it was actually pleasant. My boss sent me home early Friday afternoon -- the cold was in that stage where you can't stop sneezing, and you don't dare take the wad of tissues away from your nose, for fear of offending everyone around you. I sniffled and sneezed my way home, and crawled into bed, intending to nap for an hour or so. When the alarm went off, though, I just shut it off and went back to sleep for another hour. I felt a bit better when I woke up, so I finished some homework and spent far too much time goofing around online and playing The Sims. Had some dinner, watched a bit of TV, and went to sleep. I thought I would be awake most of the night, what with the late afternoon nap and all, but I was out cold as soon as my head hit the pillow, and didn't even move for the next 12 hours. Woke up feeling more rested than I have in years and years, and spent all my happy energy... goofing off online and playing The Sims. Sad, isn't it? I was in a good mood, feeling much better cold-wise, until about four o'clock, when I noticed a little glitch in my vision. I was trying to read, and this spot kept getting in the way, blocking out the words. It looked like the afterimage you get from looking at a bright light, but was very small, and wouldn't go away. In fact, it was getting bigger, and starting to change colors. It looked just like what used to happen years ago when I would get migraines -- pounding, nausea-inducing, knock-me-on-my-ass for two days migraines. I got them for years, starting when I was little (I don't remember how old I was when they started) until I was in high school -- I think the last really bad one happened when I was 16 or 17. I still occasionally get nasty headaches, but nothing so severe -- and I'd hoped I'd outgrown them. They always started out the same way -- my eyes would get sensitive to light, and I would notice that my hands were constantly sweating. Then I'd get that little afterimage spot, which would grow and start flashing different colors until it had taken over all of the peripheral vision in my left eye. Then the pain would start, spreading up from the back of my neck all around my head, and get more and more intense until all I could do was lie in the dark and cry. Then I'd start throwing up, over and over until I was so tired I'd fall asleep. Once I went to sleep I was usually okay -- I would still have a hell of a headache when I woke up, but it would be much less severe. At one point (I forget how old I was) I got three of these babies in a row, over the course of two or three days. I wanted to die, it hurt so much. The doctors I saw for it assumed it was hormonal -- puberty and all that good stuff -- and they seemed to be right. The headaches gradually tapered off, and I thought they were gone for good. But apparently they've decided to come back -- the little glare spot on Saturday grew until I couldn't see anything but flashing lights. I panicked a bit -- it had been so long, I couldn't think of anything to do to stop it, or to prepare for it -- and, once I realized that freaking out wasn't going to help, I turned off all the lights, pulled the blinds, and got into bed, hoping a nap would at least keep it to a minimum. It seemed to work -- I slept for an hour, and when I woke up I had one hell of a headache, but I wasn't nauseated, and I could at least function. I talked to my mom, and we decided it was probably the change in my sleeping pattern, along with the cold. I was fine Sunday -- more homework, and laundry, and Sims -- and then, this morning, on my way to work, I saw that little glare spot again. This time, I was on the T, so taking a nap wasn't an option. I got to work (by then I pretty much had tunnel vision -- all around the sides was just flashing lights) and went straight to the medical center, where a very nice, maternal nurse gave me a shot of some heavy painkiller that put me to sleep for an hour. When I woke up, I felt better -- very spacy, and a little disoriented, but my head didn't hurt much -- so I went back to work. I have some medication to take if another one starts, and an appointment with the doctor next week to get checked out -- hopefully they can put me on something that will control (if not outright prevent) the migraines, because I really don't want to deal with having them again. I still have more homework to do tonight, but all I feel like doing is curling up and sleeping -- my head feels better, but the rest of me feels like it was hit by a truck. If any of you guys have any advice on dealing with this, let me know, please?
Posted by Mary Ellen at April 23, 2001 03:08 PM